2012
in film has been another year of sequels, remakes, remakes of sequels, sequels
of remakes, book adaptations, TV adaptations, adaptations of TV adaptations
that were adaptations of books and even a film based on a board game. Suffice
to say originality has been sparse, but such is Hollywood’s marketable mentality
of appealing to audiences that will be familiar with a brand already, thus
giving them a target audience. Financially it is less of a gamble to put out a
movie that already has a following but I can’t help but kinda wish a few more
original ideas would manage to break through, instead they have likely been
pushed back to make way for the latest sequel, threequel or Justin Beiber concert
footage film which of course is much more worthy than the script that
took a new budding screenwriter a year to put together. Anyway rant over and
here’s my top ten best and worst of 2012 from the films that I have seen:
A
couple of notable films I’ve not yet had the chance to see: Argo, Moonrise
Kingdom, Taken 2, Lawless, Rock Of Ages, Sinister, so they don’t
make either list.
TOP
Ten Worst Films of 2012:
10.
The Lorax
Based
on the Dr Seuss book, The Lorax attempted to appeal to kids and spread a
message at the same time, which would have been fine if there had been enough
to keep the kids happy, but the characters are not particularly memorable and I
found the Lorax character himself quite underwhelming. There are a couple of
gags that just about save it from being a waste of time but it’s a step back
for the guys who made Despicable Me
9. Ice
Age: Continental Drift
The
Ice Age franchise peaked far too soon (almost right away) since the first
installment it’s been a gradual decline with this 4th entry in the
series proving the dullest one so far. You get the feeling that the barrel is
being well and truly scraped and the inclusion of modern songs in the
soundtrack seems a particular desperate attempt to keep it relevant and
relatable. The ice age was over a long time ago and so should have been this franchise.
8. Journey
2 The Mysterious Island
With
various animations these days looking to appeal to broader audiences than just
children it is perhaps refreshing to see a film aimed solely at kids. With it’s
hammy acting and giant animals this film almost feels like a throwback to kids
films of the 70’s and 80’s. Only trouble is they weren’t that good in the 80’s
let alone now. The Rock quite simply needs to fire his agent, add this film to
a résumé that includes The Tooth Fairy and Race to Witch Mountain and you start to wonder if
he’s intentionally committing career suicide.
7. Total
Recall
The
film they said couldn’t be re-made. What they meant was shouldn't.
All
the ingredients that made the 1990 original a cult classic have been omitted,
Mars is gone and instead all the action takes place on earth, the often
imitable but never replaceable Schwarzenegger is gone and in his place Colin
Farrell shows he can be an action star but lacks the Arnie factor that ensures
his films will sell. Total Recall is a remake no one wanted before it
was released and even less since people have seen it.
6. Wrath
Of The Titans
2010’s
Clash Of The Titans
was a lesson in how to take one of the greatest legends of Greek mythology, a
story that’s been told for centuries, and make it boring. It was a film that
was also synonymous along with 2009’s Avatar and Terminator: Salvation in asking the question: who
the hell is Sam Worthington and why is he staring in all these films suddenly?
And where has he been since? I had already forgotten everything about this sequel
by the time the credits had started rolling, The first one was bad, this one is even worse. Dull and unimaginative.
5. The
Bourne Legacy
Set
in the same universe as the previous Bourne films but not incorporating Bourne
himself and introducing new characters. It’s an idea that could have been
either brilliant or dreadful. It turns out to be the latter, a confused almost
bashful attempt that feels like homage rather than a genuine attempt at fitting
in with the previous 3 Bourne outings. Renner has the physical stuff down but he
is definitely not Matt Damon.
4. Man
On A Ledge
Suffering
form one of the worst film titles in history, this film really is as boring as
the title suggests. A convoluted plot that thinks its smarter than it is, An
idea that’s not as original as it thinks it is, and Sam Worthington, who’s not
as good as he thinks he is either. In a year that has been overloaded with
remakes, sequels and adaptations this film although from an original script just
feels like it’s all been seen and done better before, a lot better.
3. Resident
Evil: Retribution
A
franchise that likes its primary antagonists: the zombies, just doesn’t know
when to die. Retribution is the 5th installment in the franchise
based on the popular video game. Ironically this is the one that feels most
like a video game, characters move through a plot that resembles stages in a
video game, vanquishing the enemies then moving on to the next harder foe. In a
video game a ludicrous plot wouldn’t matter because you’re only there to kill
some baddies but in this film it just makes you wonder where else they can
possibly go. Proof that no matter how bad your film is, when you’ve got a
popular franchise name in the title people will throw money at you.
2. Safe
House
All
the ingredients for a very by-the-books thriller are here, but the end product
is a mish-mash so bad it has completely escaped the memory within minutes of
the end credits rolling. It’s an action thriller with barely any action (a brutal
fist fight in the second act being the film’s only memorable scene). Its the most check your watch film of the year, almost 2 hours I'll never get back.
1. Underworld:
Awakening
And
my worst film of the year is another franchise that like its main protagonists
this time, vampires, will simply not die!
This
being the 4th entry in the Underworld franchise, you do start to get
the feeling that these franchises are having a race to see who will get told to
stop making films first. The problem with this
they-want-another-film-I-know-I-can’t-believe-it-either mentality, which
stretches these franchises to the point even die-hard fans are wondering what
these filmmakers are doing means you get an end product which really feels like
they have spliced anything together and included some ridiculously over-the-top
slow motion 3D-whoreing fight scenes and effects shots just to keep the punters
happy. Pure bargain-bin filming at it’s best.
An Extra One to Avoid...
Ghost Rider: Spirit Of Vengeance
Even though this doesn’t quite make the top ten worst it is still one to avoid. In an age where it seems films based on Marvel characters can do no wrong, along come the directors of the god-awful Jason Statham starring Crank for their interpretation of Ghost Rider which feels like part-sequel and part-remake. The pacing and storytelling is simply too fast and in some cases downright bizarre, I didn’t expect much from the Crank team but this could be a challenger to 2003’s Hulk as worst marvel adaptation so far.
And
now the top ten best films of the year 2012, on the whole I actually think 2012
has produced some good entertaining flicks,
10.
Looper
The
film who’s tagline might as well have been: how can we believe that Joseph
Gordon-Levitt will look like Bruce Willis in a few years time? It is a contrast
to the similar notion proposed in this year’s Men In Black 3 where Josh Brolin is
supposed to portray a younger Tommy Lee Jones, something nobody questioned
because of his genuine likeness and his acing ability to almost perfectly mimic
Jones’ mannerisms. But in Looper’s case it is perhaps not unfair for the
filmmakers to ask for just a hint of leaving your disbelief at the door, this
is a film after all and not real life. If you can get past this casting debate
what you’ll find is Gordon-Levitt once again excelling and showing he can do
any genre you pt him in, and Bruce Willis being Bruce Willis which is something
Bruce Willis does better than anyone else. Joseph Gordon-Levitt is one of the
fastest rising stars in Hollywood and will soon be a major headliner. The time
travel element of this film will undoubtedly have a few academics waving their
thesis in protest, but once again if you can manage to leave a sense of
disbelief at the door you’ll find a terrific well-crafted movie that smartly
underplays where some wouldn’t have had the restraint.
9. This
Means War
It’s
a very tried and tested formula, two men competing for the same woman. Seen
that a hundred times before right? It’s an unoriginal premise that makes way
for a very entertaining and genuinely very funny story. Tom Hardy and Chris
Pine as two spies with a wealth of technology at their disposable to outsmart
each other are well cast and it’s sometimes difficult to decide which one to
root for. Reese Witherspoon is charming and sweet and totally believable that
she might have men fighting over her. Thoroughly enjoyable.
8. The
Descendants
It’s
difficult to categorise this film, the truth is it’s a little bit of
everything. Its refreshing to get a movie that challenges us the audience to
decide for ourselves, after all no character in this films is without their
flaws, instead we are left to wonder what we would do if faced with the same
situation, there is no good or bad, just the grey area. The films of Alexander Payne have been few and far between and have been known to divide audiences (Sideways, About Schmidt etc.) but this is easily his best film to date and well worth the wait.
7. Magic
Mike
As
a heterosexual male I was skeptical about being able to fully enjoy a movie
based around the life of male strippers. But I was pleasantly surprised to find
not just a movie about stripping but more importantly about the lifestyle and
the challenges such a profession entails. The film is very well cast with all
characters doing exactly what’s required of them, Matthew McConaughey in
particular stands out as the seedy but ambitious club owner called Dallas, a
part that could prove to be his defining role (and god knows he’s been waiting
for one). Alex Pettyfer is the new kid on the block seduced by the lifestyle
and Channing Tatum brings his own real life experiences as an exotic dancer to
a part that was clearly written for him. Turns out this isn’t just a movie for
a girls night in.
5. The
Dark Knight Rises
Chris
Nolan seems to be a man that can do no wrong. The director of the previous two
Batman films in this series as well as the excellent Inception, Memento and The Prestige is a director who could
release a two hour film about moss growing and I’d probably go and see it.
This, his final Batman film is, as you’d expect: brilliant. The Dark Knight may end up being the one in
the series people will talk about most due to the masterpiece of acting that
was Heath Ledger’s Joker but this 3rd and final Nolan Batman film
more than holds its own. It’s a testament to the director to say that even if
this one may not be as good as the last one it is still a potential film of the
year by most people’s standards, and a fitting end to one of the best movie
trilogies of all time.
4. Skyfall
Casino
Royale was
a new start for Bond and set a new standard for what to expect from future Bond
flicks even if Quantum of Solace was not the follow up that it
deserved. The financial troubles at MGM, which caused a delay in the next Bond
flick getting made, may have been a blessing in disguise as it gave everyone a
chance to step back and see what was needed. And here it is, the best Bond film
for quite some time and the highest grossing Bond film ever. Despite the
positivity surrounding Casino Royale the biggest complaint raised was it
didn’t feel like a typical Bond film. Any such qualms about this one will be
obsolete. Skyfall manages to be a perfect blend of old-school and new-school
Bond, all the classic ingredients are there complete with Bond villain just the
right side of panto-villian along with a few gadgets as well as the
reintroduction of some classic characters. Skyfall puts any doubt about James Bond
being cinema’s number 1 spy to bed.
3. The
Hunger Games
With
Harry Potter and Twilight finishing up there is space for a new franchise based
on books aimed at the younger versions of us to take their slot. The Hunger
Games has more than stepped up to the plate, director Gary Ross has brought an
extremely well crafted and engaging opening film that captures the excitement
and all the silly names that the book entails. Jennifer Lawrence continues on
her Hollywood rise to stardom having also appeared in the excellent (and my
film of the year last year) X-Men: First Class. And with sequels to both X-Men and
Hunger Games in the works she’s not going to be short of work anytime soon. On
the evidence of this film the Hunger Games franchise has the potential to be as
big as it’s Potter and Twilight Peers, and inevitably like its peers they’ll
attempt to turn the last one into two separate films just to rake in those few
extra dollars.
2. The
Avengers
It
was the film that’s been hinted at since 2008’s Iron Man’s post-credits sting where
Nick Fury shows up. 4 years and 4 other films have since passed that
foreshadowed or directly referenced the upcoming avengers film, all that can be
said about this sort of shameless promotion of films being extended trailers for
another upcoming film is: It had better be worth it! Luckily for all involved
it was, and more. The challenge when putting these characters, who had all had
their own films by now was how to give everyone enough screen time without
overdoing it. Joss Whedon who had experience with an ensemble cast in TV series
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer as well as the short-lived Firefly has crafted a movie that is
almost a perfect balance of all the characters and creates a fun energetic and
at times dangerously funny movie that lives up to the expectations 4 years
worth of promotion had created. Everyone will find a reason to enjoy this film,
whether it’s for Downey Jr’s one liners and bed hair, Loki’s delightfully evil
demeanour that ensures he was the right choice for villain or you just wanna see
Hulk smash this film has something for everyone.
1. The
Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey
And my film of the year goes to The Hobbit!
Several bars that were raised with the Lord of the Rings trilogy have been raised again with an extra 10 years of CG evolvement. The question of how to stretch the book into 3 films becomes irrelevant because as long as they're all as good as this I doubt too many people will care.
Lord of the Rings fans will love it and
even newcomers to the franchise will be talking about it long after. Lord of
the Rings may be difficult to top but equaling it seems a distinct possibility.
Roll on next year’s The Desolation Of Smaug.
Well thanks for reading and hoped you enjoyed my rundown of 2012, please feel free to leave any comments.



















